Unprofessionalism at its finest

どとんぼり川の祭り

明日デリックは大阪市に来る。彼が私の新しいケイタイーがある！ここから英語書く〜

So my friend Derick is coming tomorrow, and he is bringing me an iron. That's how unprofessional I am, don't even own an iron! This reminds me of an interview I had recently. I woke up early and dressed up in my best, and had a bit of breakfast. Time was running short so I had to rush to the train station. About halfway into my trip I realized I didn't have my resume! I left it in my apartment on my counter. No sweat there was a menu from McDonalds on the floor of the train I picked it up and grabbed a pencil from my pocket and hastily wrote my resume down.

Got to the hotel where the interview was to be held, and man was it nice! Talking about a 5 star hotel in Japan. Super sleek yet elegant looking with all the stainless steel and huge windows and plants hanging around. The interviewer bought me dinner at the hotel restaurant and we started the interview. First order of business he asked me for my resume. I handed him my handwritten resume. He glared at it, and was said, "WOW! Makes me hungry!"

"Great", I thought we are off to a good start the rest of this should be smooth sailing. so we chatted and he said he would like to do everything to get me a job with his company. As the interview progressed, I got more and more relaxed. So relaxed in fact that I loosened my tie, and then later took it off completely. The interviewer was kind of taken back by this. And he was like would you be this relaxed around your co-workers? He was like I would need to maintain a level of professionalism at all times. I commented that this interview just made me feel relaxed.

The interview concluded, so I went back and went back to sleep. Didn't get that job unfortunately :(

hmm

Dotombori祭り taken from my balcony!

Alot has happened, so much stuff that I don't even remember anymore. One thing I can say is that Osaka is bad ass! Definitely my favorite place in Japan, wish I had been living here the entire time, seems like the other years were a waste of time compared to my time here in Osaka. Anything I couldn't do in Gunma or Yamagata I can do easily here! Which explains why I never have time to blog these days, because I am always super busy. I will try and do a blog once a month, but it remains to be seen going forward if I can stick to that. As of right now I am counting down the days until I am finished with my current job and move back to being an ALT. Working in an 英会話 was okay at first, definitely made more money then when I was an ALT, but everyone just got a pay cut, and more work. So yea screw that shit, Japanese people might be willing to accept that kind of treatment but not me.

I know that the closer it gets to that last day the lazier I will probably become, and I am not concerned in the least bit. I have been working so hard that I am usually pretty exhausted. The company went bankrupt and then got bought out, in the process I lost all my vacation days. Which sucked because I was trying to take some vacation days, and my manager was being a total bitch about it. So in the end I ended up not getting a vacation and losing the days.

On top of that I am sure this new company is going to try and screw me over, so I will have to attempt to stay one step ahead. They fucked over two of my co-workers, so whats to say they wont do the same to me. They found some bullshit reasons to withhold money from their last paychecks. And my friend Nao got screwed over as well (almost) they over paid her then demanded she return the money they paid her on accident. To make that shit even more ridiculous she would have to pay the transfer fee to correct their mistake! WTF is that shit? I don't think she paid the money back, because that is some weak ass shit right there.

I expect some similar treatment. My only saving grace is they don't actually know which paycheck will be my last. The pay period is from the 15th to the 15th. I told them I would stay until the 21st to "help them out" but I have no plans on doing that shit, but I cant tell them that. I find its best to quit after you have gotten your last paycheck, that way your previously employer cant do shit to you. And that is my plan exactly. The 15th of August falls on a Saturday, and it just so happens that I work on that day. So I am going to wake up early check my bank account, make sure I got my paycheck, and if everything is okay, I will give my current company the flying bird! That will leave me with a two week break before I start my new gig!

Until then I will keep my head down and be 元気！

3rd base!

A few weeks back I had an intimate encounter with an older Japanese man. It isn't at all what you are thinking. So without further ado let the tale begin. I was a Wednesday I believe and I was at the gym across from my job. I had a good workout, and was heading to hit the showers. Outside of the shower area I was looking for a locker to put my things in. The only one available was up pretty high I had to stand on my tip toes just to reach it. While I was reaching, some Japanese man slid in-between me and the lockers to get his things from a lower locker. When he bent down to get his things his ass collided with my thighs causing me to lose balance. I fell forward, and to break my fall I grabbed on to his sides. So here we were two men at a crossroads in our life. I am sure when he was a schoolboy he never imagined he would be straddled by a sweaty black man outside of a shower. In fact this gym was in the countryside he has probably never seen a black man in his life. So his first encounter isn't the best one. I am sure a handshake would have sufficed. Once I regained my composure he said the most common word ever in Japanese すごい, meaning among other things "wonderful". That didn't make the situation any better. Once we both entered the shower area he was talking excitedly about what had just occurred. It's not like he was talking about some other random black guy everyone knew exactly who he was talking about. As I was the ONLY black guy that was a member of this particular gym. Now the locker room is like a gay prison, as awkward as that sounds that is how it is. I guess to the Japanese it's some kind of glorified piggy back ride. Personally I would hardly think carrying a fully grown naked black man on your back as something as carefree as a piggy back ride. In fact if in your life you are ever carrying a naked man on your back regardless of where he is from or his creed, something serious has happened or is about to happen.

Hmm

Haven't been able to post in awhile haven't had a computer. Hopefully soon that will all change!

Wall painting at the Happy Mexican. Awesome Fajitas!

Came back to America on the 8th of December, and I am unable to do roughly half of the stuff I set about to do here. I am a person who likes to get their money's worth. And so far I can't justify the cost of the entire trip to America yet. I am keeping a tally of any value of whatever it is I am doing here.

I had one hell of a welcome home though! When I left Osaka the weather was pretty warm I was able to wear shorts on most days, and the skies were clear and sunny. When I came back to Memphis the weather was cold and dreary, and it rained hard my entire first day. Also I got sick on that first day, and I am still sick right now. I decided to not let the rain keep me from seeing my friends, I only had a few of their numbers written hastily on a napkin. And almost all the friends I called said they couldn't hang out either because they were working or because they just didn't feel like it. WELCOME HOME!

Actually it wasn't all that bad my mom meet me at the airport with Hummus and Pita Chips yummy. But she also told me some ridiculous news. But Hummus trumps all, especially spicy Hummus.

The things I wanted to do while visiting America, (Basil said not to say "visit" since I am America more on him in a later installment) are take my new projector and PS3 back with me to Japan, see my friends, eat food I can't easily find in Japan. Upon coming back I realized my new Projector is pretty large and there is no way I could take this on a plane with me, so that is a failure. I can still take the PS3 with me so I am probably saving like $50 - $100 shipping that to Japan, still doesn't make up for the cost of actually coming to America. And as far as seeing my friends, we will just get to that later. I have been able to eat some food that would either be impossible to find or needlessly expensive in Japan, so that is a success.

Now as far as my friends. Of course they change over time, people change in general it's part of life. But they have changed dramatically this time around. And just because change is a part of life, doesn't mean I have to like or accept these changes. The most striking change is that for the most part most of my friends have become angry alcoholics, there is a fine line between a fun loving drunk and a bitter alky. And frankly they aren't straddling that line very well, at least in my eyes. But allow me to elaborate on this, so I won't just be "whining" like my friends said I was (lol).

So since I live in Japan I decided that instead of just letting the stuff I leave behind sit around and collect dust why not let other people use it and get enjoyment from it. I let friends borrow tons of video games, DVDs, thousands of dollars worth of hi-end audio equipment, my old DLP projector, clothes, and shoes. I mean you name it, and I probably let people borrow it while I live overseas. In fact I have lent out so many things, to so many different people that I have lost track of a lot of it, and it doesn't bother me generally. Another thing that doesn't bother me is when some of my stuff is accidentally misplaced or broken. I learned in college that stuff will get broken a lot even if you take great care of stuff, electronic equipment will still break down or malfunction it happens. So why am I bringing this up? Well there is a difference between accidents and malicious actions. And this time around I am facing malicious actions.

This time when I returned I decided to get back a few of my games and DVDs to take back with me. No problem, I mean I actually knew who had the things I wanted back. I meet my friends and Huey's and told them that I wanted some of my stuff back, they told me they had pawned it. I laughed because I thought it was a joke, I mean why would they pawn it? They had both gotten new jobs and were making more cash, so it's not like they were struggling, plus Memphis is a cheap place to live. So we went to chill at their apartment, and I was like alright jokes over were is my stuff at? And guess what they actually did pawn MY stuff!?! I asked them why they pawned stuff I let them borrow, because it made no sense to me. One of them immediately started yelling at me, and his logic was that over a year ago I accidentally took their copies of two games. Which I apologized for years ago, and even gave them some gifts from my old city in Japan. So what did they do in return they got bitter over something insignificant, and instead of accepting my apology for a genuine accident, they decided to pawn my stuff off just to be dicks. And as if that wasn't enough they demanded that I replace the two games from a year ago. What I did was an accident their actions were deliberate.

And it doesn't end there either, they alluded to violence to get their motives accomplished. They explained how 1 year ago (that's one full year ago) they were going to beat my ass for a genuine mistake I made, on the information that I received from another friend. If they were going to beat anyone's ass I would say fight the guy who told me that they were my copies of the game. And it isn't even like I broke into their house and stole this shit either, one of the guys was there and I was like I think these are mine and he was like yea okay. So they were alluding to still trying to fight me today, which is crude and silly. I would expect people to automatically escalate things to violence in Atlanta but I was disappointed to see this kind of thing happening amongst my own "friends" in Memphis.

And then of course there is the shit talking that comes with excessive drinking. Several of my friends including some of the friends previously mentioned have decided to just flat out talk trash to me. Why? Because I refuse to just get shit faced drunk with them, and it's not like I won't drink with them at all, I will have a beer or two, but I don't really want to just sit around and drink a whole handle of whiskey with people who are bitter about their job but at the same time trying to impress their co-workers (who are usally around now too) at my expense. Talking shit to me to impress your co-workers is pretty low, in my book. I still have about 4 or 5 friends who are still the same easy going people I remember so that is great. But these days it seems that my really good friends are my friends in Japan. I appreciate their open mindedness and acceptance of all lifestyles. Only in Japan can I be a part of a large group of people consisting of: heterosexuals, bisexuals, lesbians, alcoholics, smokers, non-smokers, businessmen, hippies, people who don't drink and bar tenders. I would never dream of hanging out with such a varied friend base, ALL AT ONE TIME, in Memphis. Perhaps in California something like that is possible but not in Memphis, I have to keep separate groups of friends to avoid clashes whereas in Japan friends of my friends are my friends by default.

But this trip has some redeeming factors I am enjoying this time sent with my family. So that is value added! But man I would be super pissed if my family wasn't here showing me the love they are. There is more I want to say in this especially about all the chaos that is happening in Japan since I am not there to handle shit. But I will save that perhaps for later, getting ready to hit the gym.

Train Tales

The Train Wranglers pushing in a few extra passengers in an already overcrowded train!



After talking to my friend Josh it has occured to me that some things I have skipped over in my blog might need to be revisted. So I present to you this installment entitled "Train Tales".

The first tale takes place on a train on the Yamanote Loop in Tokyo I was on my way to Shibuya, and the train was pretty crowded. Crowded to the point were I couldn't easily move my arms. 2 minutes into the 20 minute ride someone spanked my ass. I quickly looked about to see who the culprit was, but everyone around me was either asleep, text on their phone, or playing a Nintendo DS. I figure it was just an accident and thought nothing more about it. Then 1 minute later it happened again! I looked around to see who it could be but again I couldn't tell. This time I was on guard, and sure enough it happened again! I tried to get at least one possible suspect but I couldnt fathom anyone around me slowly spanking me. The spanking continued for the entire time I was riding the train. So I basically got slowly spanked over a 20 minute period.

The next train tale involved a train that was even more crowded. Some of you may have seen the Japanese "Train wranglers" before in pictures. What they do is push people into trains that are so full that peoples' faces are smashed against the window. I had the unfortunate time of being in a train where their services were required. I was in a relatively empty train, but at one stop in particular droves of people boarding the train car I was on. There were soo many people pushed up against me that the force of their bodies against mine lifted me right off the floor!My feet didn't touch the ground for 10 minutes. It was hot and smelly, with the smell of salary men. And the one next to me looked like he was going to throw up. And sure enough he did, but luckily it missed me and went all over 4 peoples legs and a baby's face. Thank goodness I was floating at the time!

The most recent train tale and the last for this mini series involved me being on a train for over 4 hours, and not intentionatlly either. Japanese people have the uncanny ability to sleep on the train and wake up exactly at their stop. I figured I have lived here long enough so I should be able to do the same thing right? WRONG! I missed my stop 6 times I rode the train in a complete loop 6 times!! The conductor would always wake me up at the the beginning of the train loop and ask me where I was going. I would always tell him Kireuriwari. And we would run the train and watch me miss my stop over and over again only to ask me at the beginning of the loop again where I was going. It was like being in the Twilight Zone, I thought I would never make it off that train eventually I realized I couldnt just sleep and magically know when my stop was coming up. I didnt have the circadian rhythms to do so. Well that is all for now またね~

Osaka, my new city! Yes it's wayy better than Tokyo.

So the last blog was about a computer I got for mi madre, nothing malicious as some people might have assumed.

So moving on, it has been awhile since I blogged. The reason being is I sold my laptop a few weeks back. I am currently in an internet cafe writing this blog. Alot has happened and is stil happening. I got a new job! Working 10 less hours a week and making an extra 30,000円 ($300) a month! I put in an application for a swanky new apartment in downtown Osaka, which is where I will be living now. I am still waiting to hear back from the apartment complex. One thing I will never understand about Japan is the whole real estate system. For some reason Japanese rentors are opposed to renting out to foreigners. Alot of times it is easier to become a UN representative than it is ti rent an apartment. The apartment I want has been vacant for awhile, I already showed them I am serious by putting down the $720 for the first months rent. And they were like umm we got to think about this. What is there to think about you can either have a tenant and make money or continue to let the apartment sit vacant and make nothing. Obviously Japanese rentors aren`t well versed in "opportunity costs".



I am hoping to hear something soon, I told them on last friday　I want to move in on the 26th, which is tomorrow, and I haven`t heard any kind of a response. I can forsee this year being pretty expensive. I need a new laptop of course, plus I need a washing machine, microwave, refrigerator, and a bed. I am going to try and get all that stuff pretty cheaply, but it will still probably cost like $300-$400. In addition I want to be able to play video games again. It's been a long time since I was able to sit down with my friends and play some games over the internet. I either want my Xbox sent to me or a brand new PS3! And of course that means I will need a video source, and seeing as I am opposed to TVs that means I need a projector. So very quickly my costs are rising lol. I will wait and see how things play out I am currently living off of my japanese savings, but that won't last very long.



Another thing is that I am in talks of joining an improv comedy team in Osaka! I am more of a stand-up comedian, but what ever as long as it's comedy I am down. So the end of this year has the potential to be explosive! I have to get through this week first. Unfortunately I am still in Isesaki trying to get stuff done. I really hope I hear about the apartment tomorrow so that when I go to Osaka Friday night for my cousin's wedding I will have a place to live. Or else I will be H-O-M-E-L-E-S-S. Actually I will just stay in an apartment, but still those costs add up, and I need to conserve money so I can get a new laptop early next year and possibly a game system this year. I really do wish I could be in America this time of year, not only to enjoy Thanksgiving dinner with my family, but also to buy a PS3 from Wal-Mart's Black Friday sale. Looks like I want see my friends and family again till next year