12/03/2009

Train Tales

The Train Wranglers pushing in a few extra passengers in an already overcrowded train!



After talking to my friend Josh it has occured to me that some things I have skipped over in my blog might need to be revisted. So I present to you this installment entitled "Train Tales".

The first tale takes place on a train on the Yamanote Loop in Tokyo I was on my way to Shibuya, and the train was pretty crowded. Crowded to the point were I couldn't easily move my arms. 2 minutes into the 20 minute ride someone spanked my ass. I quickly looked about to see who the culprit was, but everyone around me was either asleep, text on their phone, or playing a Nintendo DS. I figure it was just an accident and thought nothing more about it. Then 1 minute later it happened again! I looked around to see who it could be but again I couldn't tell. This time I was on guard, and sure enough it happened again! I tried to get at least one possible suspect but I couldnt fathom anyone around me slowly spanking me. The spanking continued for the entire time I was riding the train. So I basically got slowly spanked over a 20 minute period.

The next train tale involved a train that was even more crowded. Some of you may have seen the Japanese "Train wranglers" before in pictures. What they do is push people into trains that are so full that peoples' faces are smashed against the window. I had the unfortunate time of being in a train where their services were required. I was in a relatively empty train, but at one stop in particular droves of people boarding the train car I was on. There were soo many people pushed up against me that the force of their bodies against mine lifted me right off the floor!My feet didn't touch the ground for 10 minutes. It was hot and smelly, with the smell of salary men. And the one next to me looked like he was going to throw up. And sure enough he did, but luckily it missed me and went all over 4 peoples legs and a baby's face. Thank goodness I was floating at the time!

The most recent train tale and the last for this mini series involved me being on a train for over 4 hours, and not intentionatlly either. Japanese people have the uncanny ability to sleep on the train and wake up exactly at their stop. I figured I have lived here long enough so I should be able to do the same thing right? WRONG! I missed my stop 6 times I rode the train in a complete loop 6 times!! The conductor would always wake me up at the the beginning of the train loop and ask me where I was going. I would always tell him Kireuriwari. And we would run the train and watch me miss my stop over and over again only to ask me at the beginning of the loop again where I was going. It was like being in the Twilight Zone, I thought I would never make it off that train eventually I realized I couldnt just sleep and magically know when my stop was coming up. I didnt have the circadian rhythms to do so. Well that is all for now またね~

2 comments:

Nicolas Rodgers said...

that first story was had me crying. it's hilarious yet disturbing.

chocobunny said...

ahahahahahahhaahahah dude ur freakin hilarious.
i used to ride the yamanote e'y day...its not even the most packed train line in tokyo for the most part, but it definitely can get grimy...

as for ur little 4hr train ride hahahaha, reminds me of a buddy of mine, passed out on the said yamanote somethin like 630am til 3 in the afternoon, shit apparently jus kept goin round an round lolz