". . .Maybe he celebrates Kwanza. . ."

Ahh finally got some free time to write a bit. So I guess I will start off by explaining the title. I went to a party with a few of my friends. The party wasn't really all that spectacular in fact it was a pretty big let down. But the funny part was when I was leaving. My friends girlfriend told me "Merry Christmas", and some smart ass nearby said, "maybe he is Jewish, maybe he celebrates Kwanza" I couldn't help but laugh a little bit, because he beat me to my own punch line! I was about to say that exact same thing just to catch her off guard, but I wasn't quick enough on the draw. I will be quicker next time. It is part joke and part ways to keep people informed of other cultures and ideas. Like everyone just says "Merry Christmas" by default, just assuming everyone is a Christian. 

So I was out last night at Celtic getting drunk and getting crunk saw a lot of people I haven't seen in a long time. Don't even remember who all I saw but I know I saw them. Some of them are looking really good. I find that about maybe 50% of people I know from high school put on a lot of weight when they went to school. Guess it was the "freshmen 15" or something. Which I never understood if anything I lost weight freshmen year, just sitting around eating ramen and sleeping probably weighed about 130 lbs. freshmen year now I weigh about 145, but it's not fat though thank goodness for good genes, a love of cycling, and exercising. But I am glad in particular to see one person last night. I will not mention her name on her, but in high school she had an eating disorder and was always in the hospital. But now I think she has a more positive body image, and has become a beautiful young lass, I am happy that she no longer has to suffer through her disorder and can finally live her life. And speaking of living a life. . .

I need to decide what I am going to do while I wait to go into the Peace Corps. I am torn between getting a job and an apartment in Atlanta, or possibly going back to Japan or Hong Kong to live. I guess I will try for Atlanta now possibly, since it is the closet option and therefore the easier of the 3 to pursue. Plus as a bonus there is a really sweet cycling shop there that I want to check out. Hmmm decisions, decisions. . .

Why wait!?!

Photo by Emily.

So last week around 4am as I was about to lay down to go to sleep, I heard a crash. Being the curious individual I am I decided to have a look out of my window to see what all the commotion was about, I was suprised to find two guys breaking into my neighbors car! As I watched at the scene unfolding in the street I thought about the current situation in America and how hopeless America seems now. Everyday I watch the news some large corporation or organization needs a "Bailout". What exactly are we "bailing out"? I am not for most of the bailouts personally I don't think we should hand out money to ill managed organizations. Just let them deal with failure it's a part of life. Of course it would suck for all the people who will lose there job but I am kind of apathetic to them, and there shallow lives, working in their cubicles with there average salaries. It sounds harsh I know, but they do serve a purpose I need these shallow office workers to restrain themselves so that I can reach out for my dreams. Not everyone can live there dreams. Shit I might not be able to live out mine but I will try as hard as I possibly F U C K I N can. 

So speaking of reaching out for what I believe in, I am talking to an old college friend on AIM (my s/n is Vorgovnax) and he was telling me it's good that I want to help out the environment, but that I could do it here in the United States, so I should "think twice" about the Peace Corps. Sure I could work with the environment here in the US, in fact I applied to multiple positions from the EPA to the Forestry commission, but I got turned down. And of course I did, because I don't have any experience. Because in my rose tinted glasses I forgot that you need years of experience to be able to help out in the environment. Not just anyone can help the less fortunate it takes years of experience. I am saying that to be half a smart ass and half realist. But that always makes me think of the never ending cycle of "experience". Like you need experience to get pretty much every job even the "entry level" positions. Not exactly "entry level if you need 3 years of specialized sales experience in an electronics industry. You pretty much need experience to get experience it's impossible. 

So I now I can see why life is a rat races people just running around blindly after the money to "Ball". You got ta ball dawg! You ain't living life if you ain't ballin ya dig playboy? Got to have a fresh set off kicks, some spinning rims, and a fancy ass phone if you want to get the hoes son! WHYYYYYYYYYYYY??? FUCK THAT SHIT! 

Although I am not exempt from this myself. I do like to ride a fly ass bike! But last time I checked you don't get much play from the ladies if you are on a bike no matter how funky phresh it is. So having a fly bike is really just for my own aesthetic taste.

Let me tell you a story that happened a few years back. Once upon a time I was in Young Avenue Deli here in Memphis, TN having a few brews. When a girl walked up to me and my then less flaky friend Cameron. She said Hello to both of us but then after talking for a little bit she isolated me and proceed to have a very flirty conversation with me. So right before things got serious she said, "stand up for a second I want to check you out".

I guess she wanted to make sure I was worthy enough to share a bed with her later on in the evening. So she looked me up and down and like what she saw, until. . .she saw my shoes! That's right people women apparently do look at your shoes. So then she said, "Ohh my god those shoes are soo old and tattered! I would never fuck you if you wear shoes like that!"

Then her shallowness hit me like a freight train. So I said, "okay glad I found this out now, I mean I wouldn't want to sleep with someone so shallow. . ." then I paused to look around at the shoes everyone in the bar was wearing to point her in a good direction. I saw a guy wearing a pair of shiny Nikes, and I said, "well his shoes sure are fancy I guess he might be more of what you are looking for". My young female companion stormed off to go talk with someone else, obviously angered by my frankness. But her night obviously ended in failure, as I soon found her talking to me once again as I was standing outside taking in the night air. She asked me if I wanted to go back to her place! I was shocked of course because my tattered mocassins weren't up to her standards before, and I am sure her standards didn't change in the span of an hour or two. So assumed her night was met with bitter disappointment, as she found no one in the whole bar that night wearing shoes good enough to warrant going home with her. So here she was back with old tattered mocassin man. I tried to tell her I wasn't interested but this pissed her off, heaven forbid a man in mocassins turn her down!

So then she went on about how she lost her phone and I stole it ( to try and create a scene). So then she demanded I take her back to her place so I could at least help her find her phone, at this point the other by standers were interested in her irate rant and were wondering if I did steal her phone (I mean I am a minority in the south it's highly likely). So then she said "if I don't find my phone right now I am going to go home and smoke this joint!", if that was her idea of threatening me it didn't work I was unafraid as ever. 

So then I made a joke back to her, something along the lines of: "If I don't find my diaphragm right now I am going to smoke this blunt". 

So that pushed her over the edge, and as she stormed off she said, "What the fuck ever I am going to drive off in my Passat go smoke my dro and drink my wine you broke bitch. . .you probably don't even know what a diaphragm smells like!"

Everyone else standing around eavesdropping started chuckling, at the insanity of that comment. Like I should be ashamed at never having smelled a used diaphragm. I guess my life is a sham then since here I am at age 22 and I have yet to smell some strange woman's diaphragm! I might as well ride on my bike as fast as I can against traffic and end my sad life. . . 

So anyway let me end this buy going back to my AIM conversation. So I told my friend the following little thought: Why work 30 years to try to save up for retirement?? That's what everyone does it seems. It is like a tunnel vision. As soon as we start preparing for college we are brain washed by our parents, guidance counselors, and teachers to get a good high paying job so you can retire with money saved up, so we can travel the world and go to exotic locations!!! Ummm. . . why wait!?! Why should I throw away my prime years in a cubicle getting arthritis and writing reports for policies and finances I don't give a flying shit about? Why can't I just do my traveling now while I am young, why wait till I am in pain and old? It seems dumb to me, and that's why I am not going to put it off I am going to travel while I am young. Sure I probably won't ever have a serious relationship through out my 20s since I am not a sedentary individual and therefore not a good candidate for a serious relationship. I mean what woman wants a long term relationship with someone who plans on just traveling to other countries and staying away for months or even years at a time? And even if someone does want to do that, they also have to come to terms with the fact that I still have old tattered mocassins! Sorry ladies and everyone else I wear what I like to wear, if you want to sneer at me or call me gay or whatever go right ahead it doesn't faze me in the slightest. If it did I would be another clone out here in the streets wearing baggy jeans and tall tees. . .